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Managing Your Finances Before and During a Divorce

Nov 09, 2016
When divorce is imminent, finances may seem like the cherry on top of an awful situation. The level of complexity and thoroughness required is mind boggling. It doesn’t have to be. Here are several tips to help you in approaching your finances:

  1. Look at your credit history.* Don’t have a credit card? Apply for them now, and work towards establishing a good credit history. If your current credit history could be better, make sure to pay creditors now before the divorce begins. Start improving your credit history pronto!
  2. Find out exactly what your spouse earns. This is easy if your spouse gets a regular pay stub. If they’re self-employed, owns their own business, or for whatever reason, gets part of their salary in cash, make sure you keep track of the money coming in for several months.
  3. Know your household budget and expenses. Precise awareness of your average monthly expenditures as well as other monthly expenses will help determine potential spousal support or child support.
  4. Inventory your household and family possessions. A list of your belongings will help you make educated decisions when it comes time to split the property.
  5. Try to determine and tackle family debt before divorce. Allocating marital debt is one of the most difficult items to negotiate. Make sure this remains separate from any debt that was incurred by one spouse alone (“non-marital debt”).
  6. Have a way to access money of your own. Divorce can be expensive. Make sure you have your own money saved up for any and all situations.
  7. Gather all your financial documents. This can be a pretty hefty task.** Organization is key. Not only will having all your ducks in a row help your divorce move more efficiently, it will also inform important decisions and agreements you will have to make down the line. So search for any and all financial documents and make sure to keep them labeled, organized, and easy to find. Here is what you need to gather:
  • Income tax returns, including W-2, 1099, and K-1 forms from the last five years.
  • Business financial statements for you and your spouse. Include a net worth statement, as well as income statements.
  • Include all income information since your last tax return.
  • Personal property tax returns.
  • Banking information including monthly bank statements, retirement accounts, savings and loan institutions, credit unions, etc.
  • Financial statements that had been prepared by you or your spouse at any time in the last five years.
  • Any loan applications made in the last five years.
  • Brokering statements.
  • Stocks, bonds, and mutual funds.
  • Stock options, including restricted Stock.
  • Pension, money purchase plans, profit sharing, deferred compensation agreement, and retirement plans that you or your spouse have through a corporation.
  • Wills and trust agreements executed by you or wherein you have a present or contingent interest in the past five years.
  • Life insurance or certificate of life insurance policies now in existence.
  • General insurance.
  • Outstanding debts owed by you or to you (including those co-signed by you).
  • Business records or ledgers in your possession.
  • Real property, including any deeds of property you and your spouse may have an interest in – together or separately, as well as all purchase agreements, mortgages, notes, property tax statements, rental or lease agreements, appraisals, and any expenses associated with all properties.
  • Sale and option agreements on any real estate owned by you, either alone or via another person or entity, jointly or as a trustee or guardian.
  • Any personal property. Include any and all documents on any furniture, artwork, fixtures, jewelry, antiques, collections, equipment, etc. that you own, either alone or jointly through another person or entity, i.e. trustee or guardian.
  • List of personal property owned by you prior to marriage, or any personal property acquired during the marriage via inheritance or as a gift.
  • Motor vehicles owned by you and your spouse, individually or jointly, in the last five years. Include all financing agreements.
  • Corporate interests.
  • Any partnership or joint venture agreements that you have been a party of during the marriage.
  • Employment records during the term of marriage. Make sure to include any fringe benefits available to you or your spouse from any business entity, be it traveling expenses or the spa.
  • Employment contracts for which you or your spouse performed services in the last five years, including a list of oral contracts.
  • Charge account statements
  • Membership cards or any documentation showing participation in any country clubs, health clubs, spas, private clubs, etc. during the last five years of marriage. Include monthly statements.
  • Any judgments or pleadings that you’ve been a party to, either as plaintiff or defendant, during the marriage.
  • Appraisals of any assets owned by you for the past five years.
  • A list of safe deposit boxes and their contents.
  • Anything else you think may be an asset.
References
*”10 things to do if Divorce is imminent”, by Rich Stim (www.divorcecent.com)
**Created by the Bedrock Divorce Advisors, LLC, in 2011 and amended 2014 (www.bedrockdivorce.com)
See “Five best financial tips for women divorcing in 2013”, by Jeff Landers (www.forbes.com)
Originally posted by Amy O’Hanlon on Friday, October 17, 2014 9:54 AM.
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16 Dec, 2016
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12 Dec, 2016
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05 Dec, 2016
California is a “no fault” divorce state, which means that a spouse or domestic partner asking for divorce does not have to prove that the other spouse or domestic partner did something wrong. Instead, the individual claims “irreconcilable differences.” In other words, the couple agrees to disagree. No fault divorce entitles both parties to a fair and equal settlement (which includes division of assets and debts, child custody and visitation, and spousal and child support). Addiction is one of the leading contributing factors to divorce. Although it is irrelevant to no fault divorce as a whole, it can carry immense weight in settlement proceedings—especially in regards to child custody and visitation. All decisions regarding a child are made on the basis of the “Best Interest Standard.” This means that a court acts with the child’s best possible health, safety, and welfare in mind. It follows that a judge is less likely to entrust an addicted parent with a child. Often a court will attempt to ensure the child’s safety by ordering the parent complete mandatory drug tests, attend Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous meetings, and participate in supervised visitation. In the most extreme cases, a court may award full custody to the sober parent. Substance abuse is an issue of national scale. According to the most recent National Survey of Drug Use and Health (2015), “Approximately 21.5 million people aged 12 or older in 2014 had a substance use disorder (SUD) in the past year, including 17.0 million people with an alcohol use disorder, 7.1 million with an illicit drug use disorder, and 2.6 million who had both an alcohol use and an illicit drug use disorder.” Accident—including overdose—is the fourth leading cause of death in the United States. The National Vital Statistics Report (2016) calculates “a total of 49,714 persons died of drug-induced causes…[and] a total of 30,722 persons died of alcohol-induced causes in the United States” in 2014 alone. Addiction is by no means a foregone conclusion, but if it persists untreated, marriage may be one of many relationships to unravel. If you suspect a loved one to be suffering, consider the following warning signs from the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence: Loss of Control: Drinking or drugging more than a person wants to, for longer than they intended, or despite telling themselves that they wouldn’t do it this time. Neglecting Other Activities: Spending less time on activities that used to be important because of the use of alcohol or drugs. Drop in attendance and performance at work or school. Risk-Taking: More likely to take serious risks in order to obtain one’s drug of choice. Relationship Issues: People struggling with addiction are known to act out against those closest to them, particularly if someone is attempting to address their substance problems. Complaints from co-workers, supervisors, teachers, or classmates. Secrecy: Going out of one’s way to hide the amount of drugs or alcohol consumed or one’s activities when drinking or drugging. Unexplained injuries or accidents. Changing Appearance: Serious changes or deterioration in hygiene or physical appearance – lack of showering, slovenly appearance, unclean clothes. Family History: A family history of addiction can dramatically increase one’s predisposition to substance abuse. Tolerance: Over time, a person’s body adapts to a substance to the point that they need more and more of it in order to have the same reaction. Withdrawal: As the effect of the alcohol or drugs wear off, the person may experience symptoms such as anxiety or jumpiness, shakiness or trembling, sweating, nausea, vomiting, insomnia, depression, irritability, fatigue, loss of appetite, and headaches. Continued Use Despite Negative Consequences: Even though it is causing problems (on the job, in relationships, for one’s health), a person continues drinking and drugging. If you or a loved one is known to be suffering, consider the following treatments: Individual and group counseling Inpatient and residential treatment Intensive outpatient treatment Partial hospital programs Case or care management Medication Recovery support services 12-Step fellowship Peer supports Addiction Resources: Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) National Addiction Resources American Academy of Health Care Providers in the Addictive Illnesses Association of Intervention Specialists
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09 Nov, 2016
Historically, the laborious gathering of detrimental evidence was done through private investigators or subpoenas for credit card statements and phone records. The advent of social media ensures the same damning evidence is effortlessly at the fingertips of opposing counsel. It appears that people share intimate personal details online based on a false expectation that information will remain private. The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says 81 percent of its 1,600 members have used or faced evidence from social networking sites over the last five years. How can social networks sites, like Facebook, adversely impact your divorce case? No-fault divorce has been adopted across the country. As a result, evidence of wrongdoing does not have the direct impact it used to have under the former standard, fault-based divorce. Even so, information available through social networking sites can be costly. Evidence gathered from Facebook can undermine credibility in court. Consider a client who claims he can’t pay a set amount of spousal or child support. If opposing counsel discovers pictures he posted of a lavish vacation or a new luxury car, the client has tarnished his reputation. Such evidence can be used substantively in favor of a support increase. What about custody? Under both Federal and State rules, character evidence is generally impermissible in civil cases. However, in child custody determinations, courts are allowed to consider the “fitness” of each parent. In California, courts must consider the child’s health, safety, and welfare. A parent’s custody or visitation rights can be limited in cases where there is evidence of a parent’s drug, alcohol, or sex abuse; where there is excessive discipline or emotional abuse by a parent or a parent’s significant other; or where the mental and physical health of the parents is questionable. A seemingly innocuous photo of one parent slinging back a few beers at a sports bar or clubbing in a mini-skirt could reflect poorly on one’s fitness as a parent. Even guardians ad litem (court appointed representatives who advocate for a child’s best interest) are scouring social network sites when deciding which parent to recommend. In divorce or custody cases where evidence is particularly inflammatory, many clients choose to settle rather than be exposed as engaging in immoral or illegal behavior. How can you protect yourself if you are currently involved in divorce or custody litigation? The best thing you can do to protect yourself from the latent consequences of social networking is to delete your Facebook page. Choosing to maintain pages on social networking sites could compromise your interests and bargaining power in litigation. If you vehemently insist on keeping your Facebook account, here are some practical tips to help you avoid common pitfalls. Use your privacy settings to screen who can view your wall or photo albums. Don’t discuss anything that is going on in court or disclose communications between you and your lawyer. Disclosure can act as a waiver of the attorney-client privilege or confidentiality. Be careful who your “friends” are. If your privacy isn’t set tightly enough, your page (photos, especially) may be accessible via third-party accounts (“friends of friends”). Don’t contradict assertions in court with photos or posts. Even photos taken by a friend and posted on their page can turn up during litigation. Don’t demean your ex via Facebook. This is especially true if you are in a custody battle and your children have access to your page. In most cases, courts consider whether each parent is able to facilitate the child’s relationship with the other parent. The last thing you want to face in court is the accusation that you were trash talking your ex to one of your children. The bottom line: Regardless of whether you are presently going through divorce, remember that the Internet is a public forum. Once something has been posted, it can never truly be deleted. Don’t post anything online that you wouldn’t want your mother to see. Originally posted Wednesday, August 15, 2012 7:00 PM.
09 Nov, 2016
You may not have experience with courtroom decorum. Fear not. The following is a list of tips to help you avoid common faux pas. Remember that the courtroom is a formal environment: Take care of yourself. Get a good-night’s sleep and eat a full breakfast. Dress appropriately (Read: conservatively). You will have only a short period of time to make a good impression on the judge. Dressing well is a great first start. I always advise my clients to wear a suit. Do not wear jeans. Find a sitter. Do not bring your children to court unless you have been specifically requested to do so by the judge or your attorney. Children can be a distraction, and most of the subject matter covered in hearings is not appropriate for them. Leave the new beau at home. The presence of a new partner or spouse in court during divorce or custody matters will only exacerbate an already acrimonious situation. Bring a well-behaved friend to the hearing if you need emotional support. Be punctual. Allow yourself enough time to park and pass through security. Arrive outside your courtroom at least fifteen minutes before your hearing to cover any last minute details with your attorney. Turn off your phone. A ringing cellphone will only aggravate the judge and embarrass you. Don’t be that guy. Display deference. Enter and exit quietly. Stand when the judge enters or exits. If you are called to address the judge, use the title, “Your Honor.” Remain silent. Do not speak to the judge unless you are offering testimony. Your attorney is your mouthpiece. Do not communicate verbally with your attorney. Have a pad of paper ready to jot down necessary communications with counsel. Originally posted Wednesday, August 15, 2012 7:10 PM.
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